Photo by my friend Jean of a fairy chair I made
for her. The cat is really a tiny pillow, a vintage
replica, hand sewn by me. Pumpkins grown in
my tiny garden...well maybe not! :)))
Andrew, I will quit sitting around and letting time
pass while I stare out the window.
1. I robbed a bank vault when I was a kid,
and got away with it. #1 is a WHOPPER:
Not the vault!
My Grandfather lived in a very small town,
consisting of one main business street.
Years of visiting and exploring gave me
intimate knowledge of the ins and outs
of all the old business buildings. A little
like Harry Potter, I solemnly swear, I
was often up to no good. I knew where
the hidden ways into back rooms,
upper floors and basements were. The
old bank was no exception. I could and
and did get into the upper floor. It was
hot and very dusty but contained some
interesting items. I remember there
was an old cracked leather feinting couch
and a box of antique photos that I liked to
spend time studying. There were names
written on the back of many of them so
naturally I made up stories about the
personages pictured.
Then came the spring when I discovered
a new bank had been built. The old bank
was due to be demolished. I had to save
my people! I asked an older cousin to go
to the bank with me to help me rescue
the precious box. I showed him the
secret way in. There he found an antique
wooden child's wagon. He carried it out,
then went back for the heavy box of
photos, down a set of stairs, down a
dark creaking hallway and then down
another set of stairs, we made our
getaway! Pulling the wagon back to
my grandfathers, we were brazen,
hardened criminals, no fear of getting
caught.
Cousin hid the photos in my parents car
and put the wagon in his parents car.
When we heard the bank had had it's date
with destruction, he took the child's
wagon to his mother. They decided to
donate it to a local museum. I showed
my mother the box of antique photos.
Seeing the names on the backs, she
had the idea of trying to find some of
the family locally. A few phone calls,
mom hit paydirt, a man who said
he would call his sister to come take a
look. The day arrived, the elderly lady
sat on the couch and I brought her the box.
As she named the people in the pictures
she burst into tears. They were photos
which had been missing for years,
the only ones the family had. She was
terribly grateful that I had been a
bank robber and had saved her family
pictures from the wrecking ball.
I received a Christmas card every
year from her until she passed away.
2. My second cousin cut my third finger off
my right hand with scissors when I was five.
#2 is a WHOPPER: Not the whole finger,
just the top of it.
Miss smarty pants(me) knew cousin wasn't
supposed to play with Aunt Faye's scissors.
My intentions were to take them from her
and play with them myself.
She taught me the valuable lesson of never
presenting a frontal attack. Always approach from the side! The end of the finger was
reattached in the emergency room and
eventually I recovered full use of it.
I still bear the scar, it makes for a good
cautionary tale for the grand kids.
I've never liked that cousin.
3. Gypsies kidnapped me and stole
my first home.
#3 is a WHOPPER:
They didn't get me, just the small
trailer my parents were using until
the big farm house was remodeled
enough to live in.
Yes, Gypsies!!
My mother always told me when I
was being particularly awful, they
would be back for me. After reading
Ransom for Red Chief, I was ready
for them!
4. My Dad and I found a complete
skeleton in a prospector's shack in
the desert. He said if I ever told my
mother he wouldn't take me with him
to check out stuff anymore.
#4. Drum roll... TRUE!
My dad was a rockhound ,we were
tourists long before there was such a
thing. We traveled great distances
every summer in our Jeep station
wagon. Forests, mining camps, lost
caverns, all of that and more was
par for the course when I was a kid.
When we were going through a desert
my dad saw a shack south of us and
he just had to investigate. He and I
were off to see what we could see.
There behind the door to a second
room I found "him" under a deteriorated
quilt. Poor old dear had left this veil of
tears while in bed. Nothing left of him but
his bones which had become white with
desert summer's blinding heat and
winter's biting cold.
I never told my mother until my dad
himself had passed.
Dad and I did have our secrets. :)
5. I won my first Purple ribbon at the
State Fair for scratch baking when I
was eight. I entered my white cake
with strawberry icing.
#5. WHOPPER: It was a blue ribbon and
I won it in the local fair. 4H!
6. The King of Sweden visited a town
14 miles from here, I got to shake his
hand. So I have had the privilege of
shaking the hand of a past President
and a King.
14 miles from here, I got to shake his
hand. So I have had the privilege of
shaking the hand of a past President
and a King.
#6. WHOPPER: I did shake President
Eisenhower's hand, if I told you all of
that story you would swear I was
telling you another whopper. The
King of Sweden did visit and I saw him
but of course, never shook his hand.
7. I recently learned one of my Barbies
I had since I was a kid would be worth
21 thousand dollars if it was still in the
box. As it is, it is only worth about
seven thousand dollars.
Yep, it's a WHOPPER!
Mostly an outright lie!
If I still had my one and only Barbie
and she was still in the box, she would
only be worth about $700. (She was
a Champagne bubble cut Barbie. )
Well, it was fun! If I had it to do all
over again, I would tell you about our
diamond mine in Arkansas and what
we found there... and about
laying on the train tracks and letting
the train roll over me(scary!)
Oh well, maybe another time.
